Top 5 Prime Sports Relocation/Expansion Locations

With this summer's move of the Seattle SuperSonics to Oklahoma City, the ever-present threat of a team moving away from it's fanbase has been reignited. While there aren't too many teams in as imminent of danger as the Sonics were, it is interesting to look at some possibilities of future locations for new pro sports teams or new homes for established ones. To keep things from getting too complex, I've excluded intercontinental destinations for expansion. I'm also only including the three big leagues likely to expand, the NFL, MLB, NBA, and NHL. Not too many rules for this list, just one man's opinion.

5) Milwaukee, WI

Metropolitan Area Population: 1.97 million

League That Should Move Here: NHL

Reasons Why: Milwaukee is a larger city than you might think. It ranks 34th out of US media markets, higher than other sports markets such as Oklahoma City, New Orleans, and Salt Lake City. However, the size is not the reason this move would make sense. Cold weather markets tend to support hockey teams far better than teams in Southern markets. One of the newer additions to the NHL, the Minnesota Wild, ranked tenth in attendance in the league. Hockey fans in the northern Midwest, bitterly cold areas of the US, have a better hockey tradition and a better tie to the game. The Wisconsin Badgers, located less than 90 minutes away, have a hockey tradition that rivals most schools. The biggest reason this move would make sense though is the quality of the fans in Wisconsin. The Green Bay Packers fanbase is downright rabid. The Milwaukee Brewers, despite being located in a much smaller market than most teams, are 9th in MLB attendance.

Reasons Why Not: Can Milwaukee support a basketball team, a baseball team, a pro football team, and a hockey team in the region? While baseball attendance is good, basketball attendance is bad (the Bucks were 22nd in the league last season). This can be disregarded a bit as hockey makes more sense in this market than basketball anyway. What cannot be disregarded is that Milwaukee has a minor league hockey team, the Milwaukee Admirals, who barely drew in the top half of the league for fans this past season. Is the interest for hockey here strong enough?

Teams That Could Be Moved Here: Nashville Predators, Columbus Blue Jackets, Phoenix Coyotes, Florida Panthers

4) San Diego, CA

Metropolitan Area Population: 2.94 million

League That Should Come Here: NBA

Reasons Why: Yes, I know the Clippers were here back in the late 70's and 80's, but things have changed. The city is one of the ten largest in the United States and like there is regional passion for baseball in the Northeast and football in the South, there is plenty of love for basketball out West. The rivalries would be fierce, especially with the nearby Lakers. While the Clippers could/should move here, I would hope that San Diego could get a less dysfunctional/cursed/poorly-run franchise. There is enough money and enough people here to easily support three pro franchises. On paper, this looks like a pretty easy decision for the NBA.

Reasons Why Not: California fans are notoriously fair-weather fans. If a team's good, they're there. If they're bad, the team can't give tickets away fast enough. Speaking of fair weather, could the team convince city's residents that they should come inside to see a game on a beautiful day in San Diego. An outdoor arena could be an interesting idea for this market. Plus the team most likely to move here, the Clippers, would draw a far more lukewarm reaction. Also, after recently funding Petco Park, would the city be willing to fund a major arena?

Teams That Could Move Here: Los Angeles Clippers, Sacramento Kings

3) San Antonio, TX/Austin, TX

Metropolitan Area Population: 1.94 million/1.59 million

League That Should Expand Here: NFL

Reasons Why: Texas loves football. It doesn't matter if it's high school, college, or pro football, if it's a pigskin and a 100 yard field, they're on it. The Dallas Cowboys are the most valuable franchise in US pro sports. With a competitive team last season, the Houston Texans have come into their own, ranking 11th in attendance last season. Football fans in Texas are passionate and many of them have money behind them to make big things happen. San Antonio and Austin are located far enough away from both of these markets (3 hours from Houston, 4 hours from Dallas) that they can easily support a pro franchise. Austin is currently the largest city in the United States without a pro franchise in any league. The San Antonio Spurs have already found plenty of success even being in a smaller market. Helping all of this is the fact that San Antonio is one of the fastest growing cities in the United States. Either of these cities would be a great candidate for an NFL expansion team, but not both at the same time. I think there would be a huge public reception in both cases. This region of Texas is prime territory for more pro sports teams.

Reasons Why Not: Could the team survive being in the shadow of two more established teams, especially during the likely lean first few years post-expansion? Does the more artistic nature of Austin dampen the non-college fans in the area and make the team less of a fit? Other than that, this seems like a pretty good fit to me.

2) Los Angeles, CA

Metropolitan Area Population: 17.76 million

League That Should Come Here: NFL

Reasons Why: The Los Angeles area (including Anaheim) has: two NHL teams, two NBA teams, two MLB teams.... and zero NFL teams. As the second largest market in the country, it only seems to make sense that the largest league would at least have some presence here. It's too big of a market for the NFL not to take advantage of it. As long as the stadium is located somewhere close to money-rich areas of town or even downtown. There is plenty of love for football in Los Angeles. USC's football team is one of the most popular teams in the city. Both the city and the NFL would benefit from having pro football return to the City of Angels.

Reasons Why Not: The third time may not be the charm. LA/Anaheim used to have two football teams, the Rams and Raiders. They both moved for various reasons including sinking attendance and old facilities. If you thought San Diego has a problem with fair weather fans, Los Angeles is twice as bad. There are almost too many choices for LA residents and unless the football team is any good, fans won't be there. Frustratingly slow local politics also don't make this as appealing of a location as you might think. Not to mention that LA already has a pro football team in the mighty USC Trojans.

1) Las Vegas, NV

Metropolitan Area Population: 1.78 million

Leagues That Should Expand Here: NBA, MLB, NFL (in that order)

Reasons Why: I think this is almost inevitable, especially for the NBA, and if one of the major leagues enters the market the rest may follow. Las Vegas is one of the fastest growing cities in the United States, with plenty of money in the area. There are plenty of wealthy young sports fans who have shown that they don't mind dropping a few hundred or thousand dollars. Tourism is a huge part of the economy and visiting fans may be inclined to check out the team's games. Season ticket sales would be strong, especially amongst casino owners looking to impress big spenders. The city itself would attract star free agents to come and play in the city itself. A move here appears imminent for the NBA. The 2007 All Star Game, Summer League, and 2008 US Olympic Basketball Training Grounds were all hosted here. It flat out makes sense, and whichever team owner ends up with a team here will be very lucky indeed. This would be a smart move for the MLB and the NFL for many of the reasons listed above, but each has their own unique problems that I'll get into in....

Reasons Why Not: Associating sports with gambling is a messy issue in American sports culture. Any team located here will have to be extra careful not to get in bed with the local casinos. The mere juxtaposition of the two will cause endless conspiracy theories. Baseball and football each have major problems potentially moving to Sin City. Baseball sells itself on tradition more than any other sport and its fans have a long history of turning away from the game at the slightest suspicion of games being fixed. Not helping this are stodgy baseball owners unwilling to break the status quo or think in unique ways. Baseball is stuck in the past, while Vegas is a younger city of the future. The NFL has a similar, albeit smaller problem associating itself with gambling. The main issue the NFL would face is one of image. The league has had a major image problem in the last few years and reputation-minded commissioner Roger Gooddell may be unwilling to put players in a situation where they're likely to get into trouble.

Teams That Could Move Here: Milwaukee Bucks, Sacramento Kings, Oakland A's

HONORABLE MENTIONS (and why they didn't make the cut):

Anaheim, CA - NBA, NFL (fair-weather fans, attendance issues, congested sports area)
Brooklyn, NY - NBA, MLB (NBA is already moving here in 2010, no baseball team could ever replace the Dodgers)
Providence, RI - MLB (it's already a little too cramped here, is the population large/interested enough?)
Seattle, WA - NBA, NHL (not enough interest in either sport, team might have a cheapened feel in replacing the old Sonics)

See you next week with a random list of my choosing.
-Alex

Top 5 Odd/Funny Things You Might Not Notice When Watching This YouTube Video the First Time

Hey everyone,
Check out this video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tbad22CKlB4
Yeah it's pretty tame, kind of boring. Neil Sedaka doesn't really inspire a whole lot. Maybe you liked the song, maybe you didn't. Either way, this video is teeming with hidden oddities and bizarre things that you probably didn't notice watching it the first time. It also shows off a lot of differences between music videos today and in the 60's.

The items are in chronological order. No rules for this one, just enjoy.

5) Neil Yells at Someone in the Middle of the Song.

Time it Occurs: 55 seconds in.
If you couldn't tell he was lipsynching in the first place, watch closely at this point as Sedaka... supposedly in the middle of the song, turns his head, yells a few words at someone, before quickly swerving his head back and continuing singing. What was he yelling? I have no idea. Why did he decide to yell at that specific point? I have no idea. But this makes Ashlee Simpson's lipsynching look believable. It's pretty damn terrible.

4) Backup Singers? Barely...

Time: 1:54 to 2:04
And again, if you didn't realize he was lipsynching, surely you can tell these two are. They aren't even trying. I'm not sure they really know the words. The one on the right is especially bad. She giggles, turns around to talk to someone, looks down, fixes her hair. She does everything but move her lips and... you know, sing. At 2:03 you can even see Neil shake his head, probably thinking about the many ways he could kill them after the show. Can you imagine this type of thing on TV nowadays? Maybe as a bad parody...

3) That Dude's Either Really Bored or Going to Brutally Murder Someone

Time: 2:05 to 2:09
Usually people in the background of most music videos are smiling, happy to be there, or partying. This guy is the absolute opposite of that. He looks like he's either:
a) Emo
b) Going to strangle a baby
c) Bored as hell
d) All of the above.
Maybe he just doesn't like the song.

2) And She Can't Dance Either....

Time: 2:11 to 2:17
This backup dancer/singer can't do anything right can she? She figures she can't sing so she tries dancing... in the most shy, half-assed way you'll ever see. I'm just glad whatever mild swaying move she's doing didn't catch on in the 60's... It looks like she's trying to hide an erection. I'm really starting to wonder where they found this girl.

1) "That's a Gas, Man"

Time: 2:45 to 2:47
I'm not really sure who came up with that ridiculous phrase or how it came about. It doesn't really make a lot of sense. In any case, the awesome 6o's host guy is right. Just like most forms of gas, Sedaka stunk. Also, look at the picture at right. What's his hand doing in his mouth? Bizarre bizarre bizarre.

I'm out... A sports-related and far less random one coming up next time.
Later,
Alex
P.S. For anyone back at USC, I'm back tomorrow night.

Top 5 Weirdest Minor League Baseball Names

Hey!
Minor League Baseball is a staple of small towns around America. As small towns can get a little bit crazy, it's not surprising that some of these towns come up with odd names for their baseball teams. It's often all they've got, and naming something after it's major league affiliate can be extremely boring. For those of you unaware as to how the minor leagues work, they are basically support teams for MLB teams. They play at several levels, rookie, A (with many variations in terms of season length and level), AA, and AAA, with AAA being the closest to the major leagues. Each team in these leagues is affiliated with a major league team that can take its players at any time or send down players for development.

That's some basic background... here are the rules for this list:

1) What's weird to you may make perfect sense in that town's context. A name like the Cedar Rapids Kernels looks really odd at first glance, but when you consider that Iowa is known for it's corn the name fits the region. The Brevard County Manatees sounds like a dumb name too, but since the team plays in Florida they don't make this list. That doesn't mean their logo doesn't suck. Imagine a manatee trying to throw a fastball. I bet the players wearing that logo can't wait to swap jerseys.

2) But there are limits. The top team on this list sort of works given it's location in the US, but ultimately it's way too weird to not make the cut.

3) Putting yourself in someone else's shoes helps. Imagining myself rooting for the team in question helped determine who made this list and who didn't.

Alright, onto the list.

5) Fort Myers Miracle

Location: Fort Myers, FL
League: Florida State League (Advanced A)
Affiliated With: Minnesota Twins
Had Name Since: 1992
Why It's Weird: This name is weird because it doesn't make sense on several levels. If you were a fan of the team, think about how a "Go Miracle" chant just seems kind of awkward. Unlike other team names that don't end in an 's' (like Orlando Magic, Utah Jazz, Minnesota Wild, etc.) which are often ambiguous as to whether they're singular or plural, Miracle is explicitly singular. The Fort Myers Miracles would make a little more sense. Ironically, there is nothing miraculous about the Miracle's play on the field. They have yet to win a league championship. This name makes a little more sense when you realize that when the team was renamed the Miracle, they were the Miami Miracle. At least that name has alliteration going for it. This one doesn't have much.

4) Clinton LumberKings

Location: Clinton, IA
League: Midwest League (A)
Affiliated With: Texas Rangers
Had Name Since: 1994
Why It's Weird: Imagine that the Chicago Cubs, Pittsburgh Pirates, or Kansas City Royals changed their name to the Winners. Imagine if the New York Yankees changed their name to the Penny Pinchers. Imagine if the Miami Heat moved to Buffalo and didn't change their name. Clinton is not a king of much of anything. Including: winning (only 1 league championship 3 years before they had this name), lumber (the city was known as a major lumber center in the 19th century, but the forests have been majorly depleted since the 20th century began), and kings. This name is very out of date, and is a little delusional. Plus, it's dangerously close to the slightly cheesier Clinton SofaKings.

3) Everett AquaSox

Location: Everett, WA
League: Northwest League (A)
Affiliated With: Seattle Mariners
Had Name Since: 1995
Why It's Weird: This is sort of one of those names that you can just look at it and know it's a little weird. Red Sox and White Sox, if they weren't so throughly bathed in tradition, would be odd names. Say it out loud while spelling it right. "Go Socks!!!" I know some people say sports is really just rooting for laundry, but come on now... Without the tradition the name is just ridiculous. I might buy it a little bit if their logo was a blue (aqua) sock. But no, it's a frog licking a baseball. This just adds to the weird factor.

2) Jamestown Jammers

Location: Jamestown, NY
League: New York-Penn League (A)
Affiliated With: Florida Marlins
Had Name Since: 1994
Why It's Weird: To truly understand how weird this name is, check out some names that the team had to reject in a vote. The Furniture Makers, Jimmies, Lucys, and Steamers. Out of those names they did the best they could, but that's not saying much for their options. This name sort of has a cool alliteration going for it, but with a mascot made of a bundle of grapes, no clear or definite meaning, the name is just downright bizarre. Their mascot's name, by the way, is Bubba Grape, the Baseball Ape.

1) Montgomery Biscuits

Location: Montgomery, AL
League: Southern League (AA)
Affiliated With: Tampa Bay Rays
Had Name Since: 2oo4
Why It's Weird: Boy, this name is absolutely perfect regionally. It fits in well with the South, southern cooking, and the down home nature of Alabama. But even that isn't enough to keep this from being by a long shot, the weirdest name in minor league baseball in a crowded field. Think of it this way. Most sports teams have tough, intimidating, traditional, or regional names. Biscuits are soft, fluffy, and delicious. Throw on top of that that they're a side item too. I can't help but think of a player who just joined the team having to tell the local media "I'm proud to be a biscuit." This name is hilarious, bizarre, and without a doubt, #1.

HONORABLE MENTIONS

Modesto Nuts (Somewhat regional name, but still pretty funny)
Kannapolis Intimidators (Actually named after Dale Earnhardt... seriously)
Altoona Curve (Gets their name from a famous horshoe curve in a nearby railroad)
Savannah Sand Gnats (They may not beat you, but they sure as hell will annoy the crap out of you)
Albuquerque Isotopes (Made-up Fact: Only 4% of Isotopes fans really know what an isotope is)
Asheville Tourists (I hope I'm never a tourist in Asheville)
Toledo Mud Hens (With their actual mascot... Mud-donna)
Inland Empire 66ers of San Bernadino (These guys seem to be channeling the nearby Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim... even though they're affiliated with the Dodgers)

Hope you enjoyed, a new post should be coming tomorrow night.
-Alex

Why You Haven't Seen a Post on Here in a Little While

Hi there! I'll keep this short.
I haven't had internet.
Expect two/three lists sometime between now and this Monday.
Thank you for your patience.
-Alex